If you didn't know this already, quite some time ago ESPN.com made it possible for readers to to comment on their articles (Even Bill Simmons! Oh, wait, nevermind), blog-style. Shortly thereafter, they started posting a "featured comment", a comment on the front page of the website by some random commenter. Shortly after this, deadspin.com noticed the blandness of the featured comments and started posting one per day on their front page. (Most Recent: "The Wings seemed to toy with Dallas and then ... dominate in the last period. Bring on Pitt." ) Really racy stuff, huh?
After reading enough of these comments to find Rita Rudner offensive, I think I've got their system figured out. Find one of the top three stories, get there early, and either make the most general comment possible agreeing with the article, or throw in some kind of G-rated smack talk. (I.E. : "Bring on Pitt")
It is time to start the quest. I've been walking around work all day saying stuff like "The Pistons certainly showed the Magic who the best team was" and "Looks like it's finally catching up to Bonds". I have never been more ready.
Today Is Day One
(First Attempt Below)
RE: Daily Dime: Hornets one win from advancing
"Looks like the Spurs are down and out"
by
Segrin24
Look for the username Segrin24, coming to the ESPN.com featured comment soon!
(First Attempt Below)
RE: Daily Dime: Hornets one win from advancing
"Looks like the Spurs are down and out"
by
Segrin24
Look for the username Segrin24, coming to the ESPN.com featured comment soon!
21 comments:
Nice first effort, but your comment should never make the slightest attempt at expressing an opinion, let along predicting a series. You should say something more like "It may look like the Spurs are down and out, but they still have Tim Duncan." It's a bland non-statement that is perfect for ESPN featured comment.
Your quest is a noble one. Godspeed, sir.
I think you may achieve your goal. You will have to be sure to submit a comment on a consistent basis though.
yes, although i tend to enjoy the "quasi-predictions that hinge upon something really fucking obvious" - like:
"if the yankees have to play the entire season without a-rod and posada, there's no way they'll win the AL east"
make sure you mix in a few misuses of your/you're, they're/their/there, it's/its, though; this is crucial
I like this idea. Nice work, hope you make it far.
And by far, I mean a small, once-amber colored box 2/3 of the way down espn.go.com.
I dare say that you might want to change the user name to something that blatantly explains your rooting loyalties. Something along the lines of "SECfanGeauxTigers22."
Just a thought; I still think you'll make it.
This may be dangerous for your sanity. Good luck to you, sir.
good luck...keep fighting
I hate you for thinking of it first.
Best of luck. This is the most important quest of our time. Or at least the last day or two.
Don't forget blatant homerism and fifth-grade smack talk. Something like, "Kobe goes big again. Utah doesn't have a chance now! LOLZ" -freekobe69
gotta change up the screen name occasionally!
can we start a pool?
if so, i'll take June 23rd (yes, 2008)
There's no way you'll be able to do this, man, Unless you come up with some really great ideas and get a little lucky...
"now that the quest has started....it will not be finished until it is done." - YourNameHere
I love it.
Best of luck to you.
Oh my god....brilliant...what a brilliant and hilarious idea.
Maybe it's the beer talking, but LOL. Awesome.
We at ESPN.com encourage all of you to engage in this specific quest, even if doing so waters down Segrin24's chances.
you cannot underestimate the importance of crappy grammar....use a lot of those, and make sure your comment is a fragment.
Post a Comment